February 12, 2008

Letter From A Farm Kid

Dear Ma and Pa,
I am well. Hope you are.
Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly6 A. M. but I am getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things.
No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay.
Practically nothing.
Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water.
Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs ,bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food,
But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee.
Their food plus yours holds you till noon when you get fed again.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route marches," which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different.

A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home.
Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

This will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why.
The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, andit ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home

I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake.
I only beat him once.

He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 poundsand he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,


rockync said...

LOL! That was a surprise ending! I was thinking it could have been written by one of these ole boys out of Wilkes county...

sheoflittlebrain said...

I love this! All things are relative! The ending got me too:)

Morris said...

Seen it before but still LMAO!

Yep, nice twist on the end, though..

Anonymous said...

I like this one. Good story.

k said...


Thank you, Jan. I needed that.

Jan said...

rockync..or lots of other counties that we are used to, right? :)

Jan said...

She..it was a surprise, wasn't it? :)

Jan said...

morris..I love surprise endings! :)

Jan said...

Hermit..thanks, I'm glad you liked it! :)

Jan said...

k..you're welcome!

I'm glad it gave you a good laugh! I could have used a few more, myself, the past few weeks! :)

Richard said...

That was very good. As I read I was thinking about my experiences on the farm in Wisconsin as a younger man. Thought about letters from my son during his tour in the first Iraq war. He was just as amazed by the people he met in the military. Then I had to laugh at the end because I'll be darned if my daughter isn't the best shot in the whole family!
I enjoyed that. Thanks.

Jan said...

Richard..thank you, I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

I guess being exposed to all the diversity one finds in the military would be pretty amazing. :)