August 26, 2007

Did You Ever Wonder

Have you ever felt this way? I'll bet a lot of us one time or another. I have.

Sometimes, I wonder what it's all about. What is this dissatisfaction I feel, even in the midst of what some think of as the good life? What is that which keeps nipping and tugging at the back of my mind--never quite letting me get the feel of, or really get caught up in, all that's going on around me?

Why this feeling of detachment, of not being with it--as if I'm standing back, watching myself, and others perform? I sometimes feel as if that's exactly what it is--a perfomance, a roll we've been assigned to play. Worst of all, I wonder which roll I'm playing, because I don't really know who I am--and I wonder if we make what or who we are, or does what we are, make us?Have we the choice to become what we really want to be--regardless of how others view us--or do we conform to the way they think we should be?

To whom do we owe the responsibility of what we are, or shall become? To ourselves, or to others who are totally without concept of the way we feel--of what we are really feeling? Is all this the reason why someone, long ago, was compelled to say "To thine ownself be true," and yet, how can I be true to the self I do not know? And how do I find out who I really am? Will I ever know, or am I supposed to go on playing the roll--on, and on, and on-- until Someone,
finally, calls "Curtain!"

I know that there are times of confusion about the people and events in our lives. We will always have our times of sorrow, and anguish, and we feel as if life might as well be over, because there is no hope. There are times when happiness seems to elude us like a flitting butterfly, but try to look at it all in perspective. Just keep reaching for tomorrow. It's still there.


Livey said...

Hell if I know who I am, considering.... ;)

Jan said...

Maybe not...but nobody can say that you haven't tried like heck to find out!